We the human race have developed and adjusted over a long period of time to think we are the best species on the planet. Maybe we are if we judge that on what we have created, designed & written over the centuries.
BUT maybe when we look at other species who aren't creative or challenged by daily life but simply live, we can be inspired to try and live the same.
When human beings are in an unpleasant situation whether that be physical, emotional or relational or a mixture of all three, they tend to pull away and hide, retreating into their own thoughts, which if through overthinking they get clouded can be dangerous to themselves and those around them.
When 2 people act in this way, it's a little like 2 magnets, they come together but the positives or negatives push against each other, forcing the other one away and pushing and pushing,with power, away.
Outside influences( work, money, hobbies or new faces) can become unwanted head turners & more attractive, making you smile & be distracted for a short time, stopping the realignment of the magnets back to their correct way & seemingly unimportant.
It's only when one end is turned around that the the two magnets can lock together tightly.
So when two people, whether it be a friendship, relationship or marriage keep pushing away, as the time lapses on, the resentment or anger towards them grows making it harder, through stubbornness to reconnect.
This is a very human way of dealing with situations, we are the only species on the planet to act in such ways.
Dogs and other animals don't possess this behaviour.
A dogs magnet attraction is with its owner, this can never be turned to a negative for the dog because they have that inner connection & because of a dogs mindset can never be turned. So even if their human gets grumpy or angry about some sort of action the dog has done and goes into the typical human response of shutting out or down, albeit for a short amount of time, but because the dog doesn't respond this way, the magnets of trust, love and understanding never come unlocked, they simply can't (because the dogs side can't think of doing this).
When a dog meets another dog, it's all about energy & how they approach each other. If two dogs are approaching each other and have eye to eye contact, if one doesn't look away it can be seen as conflict. It takes one to be the submissive one to have a fruitful outcome or aggression can be the final result if the stare isn't broken. But again most dogs don't want this, one will glance away and as they meet, noses go down the body until they reach the butt end and they read each other from there. Once they have decided if they like each other they may instigate play or if they aren't interested, they carry on with their day.
No grudges or long drawn out disputes,no ego's or resentment.
There are the odd occasions when a dog shows signs of excitement or aggression to another dog through its memory and senses. To us humans it can be seen as a grudge or an old feud but to the dog it's generally a scent of a dog or person that triggers a negative emotional response. A dog doesn't walk about waiting to bump into their enemy waiting for a fight but if their sensory memory is triggered it may show a response. This can also be triggered by the person walking them, as their memory about the previous incident kicks in, the walker may tense up(without knowing) and act more nervously, the dog feels these senses change and connect that to the scent and "boom" it all kicks off!
This may be like that on a walk around the local area too, where we think our dog has a grudge with a dog up the road, but again it's usually triggered by the way we suddenly act, pulling the lead tight and getting anxious plus the dog behind the gate may do that to all dogs as it's protecting it's property...nothing personal!
I walk a beautiful boy called Louis, he is an Irish Setter. He has two "enemies" in an area where we walk. One is an older gentleman with an angry black lab & the other an older lady with a spaniel.
The ongoing incidents with these people is almost a joke to me and Louis owner as he just loves everyone else!
Louis memory is triggered through scent when he sees or smells them in the area. The older man and his black lab are connected to Louis deceased owner and many dog park incidents . The man always used to swear and shout at Louis(& Us) as he ran to the fence to see the man's Labrador on the other side, over time and conditioning, Louis connected the aggressive man and dog to this ongoing abuse and it became the normal for him to act as the others were. To this day if we do,on occasion see this man & dog, Louis still gets agitated, although he is now trained to not over respond!
The same with the Lady and Spaniel, because she shouts "get away" in a high over excited energy to dog walkers around her. She has over time taught her dog to react & only be on the lead and she believes it's aggressive to all, so keeping it away and other dogs away too is a logical answer, but the trouble is, by becoming loud and excited, it can trigger passing dogs to react, where if it was quiet and calm, would probably pass by without incident. Louis again has learnt that this lady and dog trigger a high response and acts "stupid" for a few seconds before realising that the walk is more fun & just carries on.
If only the human race could move on as quickly and learn to forgive and love.
"Be more dog" is probably the answer to all of us humans who carry a fued or falling out for many days or weeks only really hurting ourselves.
But by us being "more dog" we don't want to start greeting each other with a butt sniff (stick to a 🖐️ or handshake or hug!!)
But we can learn so much from the creatures around us and our dogs, by just loving unconditionally, getting on with the present & not dwelling on history or the future & knowing when to just come alongside someone with a hug & no words needed just a loving energy.
I hope 2024 brings you all the joy and love and time to spend with your dogs and loved ones.